Handshakes–Symbol of Equality?

After I had used a picture of a handshake for my blog-post on Agreements – I started wondering where the hell the custom of shaking hands actually comes from.
I briefly discussed it with Leila and we figured that – although handshakes are currently a symbol of equality, agreement, camaraderie, welcoming and respect – it probably has its origin in deception.

The clinging of glasses against each other is an example of a symbol or custom – which currently has a ‘positive’ connotation – that has its origins within deception: people would cling their glasses together to make sure that the person they’re drinking with hadn’t poisoned their drink. As the glasses/cups/mugs hit each other – the contents of the one glass will spill over into the other one and vice versa. Thus – if the other had poisoned my drink, he will now have to drink his own poison, because the drinks have now been ‘mixed’.  If the other is willing to drink – then I know that drinking is safe.

So – the practice of clinging glasses against each other before drinking was done to ‘prove’ to each other that ‘I have no mischievous intentions’ – and thus, originates in distrust and fear of betrayal.

So – I was curious as to where handshakes originated from – I looked it up. Here is the most common explanation:

There are 3 steps within the handshake:
  1. The extension of the hand to the other
  2. The grabbing of the hand
  3. The shaking of hands
And – lo and behold – each of these steps originated from a point of fear and distrust:

1. The extension of the hand to the other:

Extending your open hand to the person across from you – usually the right hand – was a sign that you weren’t carrying a weapon. Weapons were usually held in the right hand, therefore one would extend the right hand in front of self, so that the person across can see that you’re not carrying a weapon.

2. The grabbing of the hand:

The grabbing of the hand was done to ensure that – if any small weapons had been hidden, one would be able to feel them. Either one would grab the wrist instead of the hand, to feel if there was something hidden underneath the sleeve – or one would grab the hand with the right hand and with the left hand pat down the arm. Any hidden weapons or objects would be felt and revealed.

3. The shaking of hands:

To absolutely make sure that there are no surprises – one would shake hands – any objects or weapons that had been missed in the previous step, would fall out of the sleeve.
Such customs reveal the reality that: everything that we perceive as ‘positive’ actually has its origins within that which we deem as ‘negative’. One can verify this for each and every single point within reality that self sees as ‘good’ or ‘positive’ – it all originates within deception.

To train yourself in seeing through the veil of perception – Join Desteni ‘I’ Process: www.desteniiprocess.com


  1. Hugs are much cooler than Handshakes!

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  3. Interesting points exposed here - Thanks for sharing Maite

  4. Awesome blog Maite, it is important for all human beings to investigate all points that we participate within and as and stop and clear our starting point and correct ourselves, stand equal to all within the consideration of all that is here to bring about a world that is best for all, so that one day we won't have such expressions and the children to come will be born into a world where separation and self dishonesty was not the starting point.